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Elvis Chidera

Agile Flow - Rap Song

agile, rap1 min read

MC

Uninteresting song about agile methodology.

We were using waterfall

As that was the industry protocol

At a point, we started loosing, and it appeared confusing

It felt like we've hit a wall at the checkpoint

It was clear we were bruising


Project managers didn't get it, cause our projects stalled

Requirements were brewed unchecked, and they grew so tall

That our dear engineers fear

No matter how they brawled

These projects ain't gonna ship at all


Projects laid scattered

But project managers lathered with flatter

Engineers started to chatter

It was clear this was a new chapter

Where we were no longer faster, and falling in the waterfall

Senior management knew they had to shatter the later

Once and for all


We made the call to implement products in increments

And hoped that the by-product solves our predicament

Thats when Rauf came into the picture to help us morph

From fragile waterfall to agile metaphors


With some instruments he tried to bring us back to shore

And taught us some lessons which has been a blessing

Gonna share them now in this small session


First, you must empower your team to take action

Cross functional teams with an innate passion

To ensure customer satisfaction

Staying in interaction is your superpower

And only course of action


This helps you to sit with your team to split features into bits

Commit to do it repeatedly

Use a toolkit as your team permits

Store them on a hardboard or on an e-board

Whichever you can afford

Hardboards are easy to onboard

E-boards are hard to be ignored

The board is your team's backlog

With a watchdog called the Scrum master


He creates racks which are called sprints

Where you stack tickets with the biggest impact footprint

And attack them in two or three weeks stint

Keep track of each sprint like its calories

Each ticket should be compact in the gallery


Lastly, you have to observe the scrum rituals

Standup meetings is the most habitual

Where teams participate and share their feelings

This is done daily to facilitate collaboration

Eliminate distraction and demonstrate progression


These you will use at your retrospective meeting

To understand from a different perspective

What was defective and effective as a collective

And apply some correctives as part of the next sprint objective


Agile is iterative like that

Giving you full utility of your team's ability

Providing visibility for each responsibility

That ensures the project's viability


Our projects are in a stronger lane

Project managers are no longer insane

Stakeholders no longer ponder

As they are again entertained


Our team is fire man, you cannot flame us

We love agile man, you cannot blame us

We going higher now, you cannot tame us

We beating our chest

About to go apesh*t on the request list

You can put us on the ape list

We coming for the conquest

Smashing any coming contest


I hope you learned from our lesson, no need for stressing

Pickup agile and start progressing towards progression

(PS: Rauf was the agile coach at a previous company)

© 2020 by Elvis Chidera. All rights reserved.